Wanderlust

Whenever I hear the word ‘wanderlust’, my mind drifts to a place far, far away. A place full with adventure, beautiful scenery, and great food. The word simply ignites an almost magical and blissful feeling inside me. The word ‘wanderlust’ means a strong desire to travel but it’s so much more than that… From a person who has suffered from it’s paralyzing effects, I can say with great confidence and respect that it is a powerful, overwhelming feeling. It controls you in ways you wouldn’t have thought possible. If left untreated, you can see symptoms of depression, restlessness, and dissatisfaction.

I remember the strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. My gut told me there was something wrong… something just wasn’t right. Everything felt out-of-place. I began loosing taste for my favorite foods. I became easy annoyed and frustrated with my daily routine: eat, work, sleep, repeat. The simplicity of my life suddenly felt suffocating. The familiar four walls felt more like a cage compared to the fortress of solitude it once was. Disoriented and feeling constantly defeated, I knew I was not myself however I couldn’t figure out what it was!

I noticed that as time went on, things got worst. I went back to writing and self-reflecting in attempt to figure out what was wrong with me. The more I explored the depths of my mind, I noticed it often found itself in the same place. What felt like a mental escape turned out to be something more… My mind began to reveal itself and spoke to me the language of the heart. My heart.

I found myself back in time, back to a place of blissful memories. My mind traveled thousands of miles away from where I was and before I knew it, I was in Marrakesh, Morocco. As the memory became clearer and clearer, the rush of emotions came flooding in. I remember the fear I felt as my friends and I exploring the foreign land, wandering through the maze that was the infamous Marrakesh market as a stranger guided us to our hidden hostel. I remembered the excitement of finally reaching our destination and tasting the sweetness and comfort of freshly brewed Moroccan mint tea. The moment of when it touched my lips burned into my memory; I remembered how the warmth spread throughout my body as a peaceful wave of happiness overcame me.

As much as I tried to savor the moment, it slipped through my fingers as quickly as it came. It was then that I realized that it wasn’t something I was doing wrong, it was something that I wasn’t doing. I woke up from my daydream, feeling dazed yet somehow refreshed with excitement. My epiphany reignited my love for life again as my brain exploded with possibilities and travel destinations. It was then that I realized the consuming power of wanderlust and I knew there was nothing standing in my way of achieving happiness. And I refused to wait any longer; I had to leave.

M

Inspired by my personal suffering

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